Friday, February 19, 2010

Fun and Frivolity: Keepin' It Political

We're going to keep it political this time around because I've gotten so much funny stuff that is political in nature. Enjoy!

From Gregg...
This is what the last few First Couples looked like coming into the White House...and the second photo is what they look like going out...


Alexander Hamilton, founding father, first secretary of the treasure and leader of the constitutional convention:

Andrew Jackson, "Old Hickory " fought the British in New Orleans:

Ulysses Grant, Union army general, lead the North through the Civil War:

Ben Franklin, Genius inventor, political theorist and leading author of the constitution:

Where to put our current President's picture:

(More of his voters will see it here than any other place, so it is appropriate.)
First came the commemorative coins, then the T-shirts, and then the plates. Now, something for the rest of us...

Sweet! But only one square per person, please!

From Patriot Post...

Lawrence Livermore National Laboratory in California has now identified with certainty the heaviest element known to science.

The new element, Pelosium (PL), has one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons, and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.

These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons.

Pelosium is inert, and has no charge and no magnetism. Nevertheless, it can be detected because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A tiny amount of Pelosium can cause a reaction that would normally take less than a second, to take from 4 days to 4 years to complete.

Pelosium has a normal half-life of 2 years. It does not decay, but instead undergoes a biennial reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places.

Pelosium mass will increase over time, since each reorganization will promote many morons to become isodopes.

This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that Pelosium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass.

When catalyzed with money, Pelosium becomes Senatorium, an element that radiates just as much energy as Pelosium since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons.

My dog sleeps about 20 hours a day. He has his food prepared for him. He can eat whenever he wants, 24/7/365. His meals are provided at no cost to him. He visits the Dr. once a year for his checkup, and again during the year if any medical needs arise. For this he pays nothing, and nothing is required of him. He lives in a nice neighborhood in a house that is much larger than he needs, but he is not required to do any upkeep. If he makes a mess, someone else cleans it up. He has his choice of luxurious places to sleep. He receives these accommodations absolutely free. He is living like a king, and has absolutely no expenses whatsoever. All of his costs are picked up by others who go out and earn a living every day. I was just thinking about all this, and suddenly it hit me like a brick in the head: My dog must be a democrat!
That's probably enough for this week - you get the point, I'm sure. Stay tuned for next Friday, when I expect to post more stories like these. Until then, have a great weekend!

The Carlson Crew

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