First, a former Israeli general suggests that tadalafil, the active ingredient in the popular anti-impotence drug Cialis, could help fighter pilots breathe easier at high altitudes. The Israeli military officially denies any plans to offer this...uh...drug assistance...to its personnel. I won't comment any further on this one, other than to say I'm surprised it wasn't the U.S. that first came up with the idea. [Sorry, I couldn't resist...!]
Second, I stumbled across a rather enterprising soul named Joe Carter who has compiled a list of preemptive apologies to cover pretty much everything. It begins like this:
Calvin Coolidge, a president known for being a man of few words, was so famous for saying so little that a White House dinner guest made a bet that she could get the president to say more than two words. When she told the president of her wager he simply replied: "You lose."
Coolidge understood that the less you say the less you'll be expected to apologize for later. Unfortunately, few politicians since Coolidge have learned that lesson, as evidenced by the continued outbreak of foot-in-mouth disease among politicos.
In order to avoid similar embarrassment, I've decided to take a proactive approach and issue a preemptive apology before anyone calls for my resignation:
Because I am a Christian I realize that I must take responsibility for any atrocities committed in the name of my faith. I therefore apologize for the Crusades, the Spanish Inquisition, the Salem Witch Trials, Lutheranism, and Jimmy Swaggert.
I apologize for using overheated political rhetoric. Specifically, my referring to Adolph Hitler as a Nazi and for implying that Joseph Goebbels used 'Hitlerian' tactics to advance his party's political agenda.
I apologize for being born a white American male. Even though it was my wish to be born a cocoa-skinned Ecuadorian girl, I still take full responsibility for the genetic hand that I was dealt.
I have to say that this is one of the most entertaining collections of thoughts I've read in a very long time, especially given the apparent fascination our country now has with apologies. It is well worth your time to check out the whole thing for a good chuckle or three!
Have a great weekend!
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